So here’s the deal: I haven’t actually sat down and watched WWE regularly since last year’s WrestleMania. I’ve loosely kept up with stories and results, but as far as committing to weekly shows or Premium Live Events? The motivation just hasn’t really been there. I have a list of issues with WWE that is probably its own post, honestly.
That said… the Royal Rumble is still one of my favorite wrestling events every year, and when I saw it was playing in theaters, my self-control immediately folded. Because let’s be real — you can’t say no to the potential of surprise returns and “oh my god that music hit” debuts, especially with a crowd of like minded people.
Women’s Royal Rumble (winner: Liv Morgan)
After coming close a few times, Liv Morgan finally went the distance and won the Royal Rumble, last eliminating a returning Tiffany Stratton and even tossing her own Judgment Day partner Raquel Rodriguez out along the way. Not to be lost in the shuffle, but Sol Ruca quietly had a breakout performance of her own, which hopefully leads to a push. The only true shocking moment was Brie Bella popping back up, but honestly, the women’s roster is so stacked right now that stuffing in a bunch of surprise returns probably would’ve just cluttered things.
Overall? A really fun opener. Creative gear work around the Saudi restrictions too — even if I still hate that WWE keeps taking the blood money to run shows there.
Gunther defeated AJ Styles
With his career on the line, AJ Styles vs Gunther had built-in tension and absolutely delivered.
Gunther really has that final boss aura now — already retiring Goldberg and John Cena, and now choking Styles out with a sleeper like some unstoppable endgame villain. Credit where it’s due: WWE has nailed him as the monster heel you desperately want to see lose.
Also kinda poetic (and cruel) that Styles debuted at the Royal Rumble in 2016 and his career ends at the same show ten years later…or does it? I refuse to believe AJ doesn’t pop back up for a few matches in Total Nonstop Action Wrestling where he originally made his name. That just feels too fitting.
WWE Championship: Drew McIntyre defeated Sami Zayn to retain
No offense to Sami Zayn or Drew McIntyre, but I’m gonna be honest — this was my designated bathroom break before the men’s Royal Rumble match.
As much as I love Sami, there was just zero universe where he was winning this match, there was also zero chance WWE was cutting Drew’s title reign short again, even if the crowd would’ve exploded for it. They had a couple of near-falls, but it always felt like the same story: Sami fighting uphill, Drew just being too big and too much.Realistically, Drew’s holding that belt until WrestleMania at minimum — and honestly, hopefully past it after he beats Cody Rhodes again.
For the love of God, please don’t hot-potato the title back to Cody already. Let Drew cook and have the lengthy title run in front of live audiences that eluded him during the pandemic and in storyline!
Men’s Royal Rumble (winner: Roman Reigns)
Is it safe booking to give the win to the guy who’s already main-evented more WrestleManias than basically anyone? Sure.
But love him or hate him, Roman Reigns is still a draw, and a Reigns vs CM Punk match sounds pretty great on paper if that’s where this is headed. Like the women’s match, this Rumble wasn’t huge on shock value. The main “wait a second” moment was Bron Breakker getting jumped on his way to the ring by a hooded mystery person (hi, probably Seth Rollins), which basically set him up to get dumped fast by Oba Femi, who looked like a monster all night. We also got the debut of Royce Keys (formerly Powerhouse Hobbs), which was a nice surprise. Overall? Fun, easy to watch, maybe a little predictable — but sometimes predictable chaos is still good chaos.
Final Thoughts
Was it a fun show and an easy way to kill a few hours? Sure.
Was it some all-time, “I’ll still be talking about this in five years” kind of Royal Rumble? No it wasn’t, but it didn’t need to be.
It did exactly what a Rumble is supposed to do: kick off the road to WrestleMania, set up a few new stories, and give us some direction heading into the “show of shows.” Nothing revolutionary, nothing disastrous — just an entertaining night of wrestling that understood the assignment.