*Game Grumps Animated Intro* [Arin] Wait, I have– [Dan] You’ve forgotten to use it.
[Arin] I have room for another one. [Dan] Great. [Arin] Read Zelda’s diary?
[Dan] Hell yeah. [Arin] This seems… [Arin] Yes.
[Dan] Dude, she died 100 years ago. *beautiful Breath of the Wild music* [Zelda-Arin] Tomorrow my father is
assigning him as my appointed knight. And he’s just so cute! [Zelda-Dan] I love his music *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] I- *laughs* I set out for Goron City today
to make some adjustments to Divine Beast Vah Rudanananananana. I still recall feeling his eyes on me as I walked ahead. [Zelda-Dan] Then his hands. [Zelda-Arin] I hate how he can pull out
his eyes and rub them against you. [Zelda-Dan] It’s weird. [Zelda-Arin] I never know what he’s thinking,
it makes my imagination run wild. Guessing at what he is thinking, but will not say. [Arin] Jesus, fucking flip-flopping way of saying shit.
[Dan] I know. Man… [Zelda-Arin] But what the boy- what does the boy chosen by the sword
that seals the darkness think of me? Will I ever truly know? [Arin] *gasp* (whisper) She’s talking about us. [Dan] Oh my god. You just start jacking it. [Zelda-Arin] That I suppose is simple, A daughter of vurvava…*inaudible* I said something awful to him today! [Zelda-Dan] I told him I like Billy.
[Arin] *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] I don’t actually like Billy!
I just wanted to make him jealous. [Zelda-Arin] What do I do?
[Zelda-Dan] It backfired… [Zelda-Arin] My research was going nowhere.
I was feeling depressed and I told him repeatedly not to accompany me. But he did anyways! As he always does. So yelled at him without restraint. [Zelda-Arin] He was into it.
[Dan] *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] He seemed confused from anger.
I feel terribly guilty and that guilt only makes me
more agitated than I was before. [Zelda-Arin] And I’m really mad!
[Dan] Oh my god. [Zelda-Dan] And that agitation makes me guilty And that suit makes me agitated! [Zelda-Arin] I’m so unsure how to put
today’s events into words. Words so often evade me lately,
and now more than ever. [Dan] Really? It feels like a fucking
avalanche of words actually. [Zelda-Arin] He saved me.
Without a thought for his own life, he protected me from the
ruthless blights of the Yiga Clan. He was there for me. I won’t ever forget that. Tomorrow I shall apologize for
all that has transpired between us. [Zelda-Dan] I sure hope I don’t die for 100 years! [Zelda-Arin] And then I will try talking to him. [Zelda-Dan] To Lahnk. It’s worth a shot. [Zelda-Arin] Today I found out his name is Link. [Zelda-Arin] Holy shi-
[Both] *laugh* [Zelda-Arin] Bit by bit I’ve gotten Link to open up to me. Turns out he’s quite a glutton! [Zelda-Arin] He can’t resist a delicious meal.
[Zelda-Dan] Yeah… [Zelda-Dan] Let’s see if he wants
to snack on these titties for– [Sound effect] Wow!
[Both] *laugh* [Link-Arin] Ohhh… [Link-Arin] OHHHH….!
[Both] *in hysterics* [Zelda-Arin] I wish to talk to him more, and to see
what lies beneath those calm waters. [Zelda-Dan] And that hot, nasty clavicle. [Zelda-Arin] Father scolded be again today.
[Dan] Oh my god… [Zelda-Arin] Words truly evade me. [Zelda-Arin] He insisted that I focus instead on training. that will help me awaken my sealing magic. *seal noise* [Zelda-Dan] I released 40 seals today.
[Arin] *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] It’s going well. One of them
stood on his hind fins and clapped. [Zelda-Dan] I can throw them beach balls
and they return them to me. More later. [Zelda-Arin] I was so frustrated and ashamed,
I could not even speak. Words are constantly evading me. I’ve been training since I was a child and yet, Mother passed the year before
my training was to begin. [Zelda-Dan] Now it’s just me and the seals. [Zelda-Arin] In losing– I put a wig on one of the seals,
so it’s kind of like my mom. [Zelda-Dan] Kind of. [Zelda-Arin] Mother used to smile and tell me, “Zelda my love. All will be well in the end. “You can do anything.” I fucking hated her for it! [Zelda-Dan] “Anything that you can do, I can do better.” She was a bitch. [Zelda-Arin] But she was wrong! No matter how much I try or how much time passes, the sealing power that is my birthright evades me. Just like words! [Zelda-Dan] They’ve drifted out into the open water to start seal families of their own. [Arin] *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] I miss them dearly.
[Dan] *laughs* [Zelda-Arin] Tomorrow, I journey with Link
to the Spring of Power to train. But this, too, will end in failure. Such is my curse. [Zelda-Arin] I had a dream last night.
[Zelda-Dan] A seal dream. [Both] *laugh* [Zelda-Arin] In a place consumed
by darkness, a lone woman gazed at me, Haloed by blinding light. I sensed she was not of this world. I don’t know if she was a fairy or a goddess,
but she was beautiful. [Zelda-Arin] Very seal like.
[Zelda-Dan] She loved fish. She had whiskers. [Zelda-Arin] And she balanced a beach ball on her nose. Her lips spoke urgently, but her voice did not reach me. Could words have evaded her? [Dan] *in hysterics* [Zelda-Arin] Or was my dream simply
a manifestation of my fears? [Zelda-Dan] My seals have finished their training. and have become an elite task force known as Seal Team Six. [Zelda-Arin] They were sent out on a dangerous
mission to murder many innocents. I didn’t approve, but, you know,
that’s just how it goes I guess. Actually I’ve had horrible feeling
ever since that weird dream. No one would believe a failure of
a princess, but… right now… THE SEALS ARE OUR ONLY HOPE! [Zelda-Dan] Deploy Seal Team Six! [Arin] *seal noises* [Both] *laugh* *Game Grumps Animated outro* [Zelda-Dan] Oh god, the seals have attacked. [Both] *laugh* [Zelda-Dan] They’re highly trained
and using it against us. [Both] *laugh* [Zelda-Arin] The seals took over the Guardians! [Both] *laugh even louder* [Zelda-Dan] Who saw that shit coming? I’ve never felt more betrayed. [Both] *l a u g h t e r* [Zelda-Arin] They were once my family, but now they’re the source of the Calamity…